9 Important Communication Skills for Couples and How To Communicate Better
Welcome to this article on 9 Important Communication Skills for Couples and How To Communicate Better. Firstly an important aspect of healthy communication is that each party communicates that they care what the other party thinks and feels. So often in relationships this is the point at which things can fall down. If this is not demonstrated and communicated, this can lead to anger, distress and defensiveness. And can often lead to competition and accusations rather than collaboration.
Several researchers have consistently identified communication as a very important part of maintaining a healthy relationship.
Effective communication is critical to successful relationships. Researchers and therapists have found at least nine skills that can help couples learn to talk effectively about important issues (Gottman 1994; Markman, Stanley, and Blumberg 2010; Schramm and Harris 2011). How we interact about issues such as time spent together/apart, money, health, gender differences, children, family, friends, commitment, trust, and intimacy affects our ability to develop and maintain lasting marital friendships. If learned well, these nine skills can help put our relationships on a positive trajectory for success.
Time Together/Apart (Communication Skills for Couples)
Both the quantity and quality of time we spend together influence the well-being of our marital friendships. Spending time apart participating in other activities also influences the well-being of our relationships.
Money (Communication Skills for Couples)
How we think and talk about money, our spending habits, and our ability to budget, invest, and plan for the future impact couple financial management processes and practices.
Health (Communication Skills for Couples)
Couples must talk about many health-related issues, including nutrition, exercise, illness, disease, accidents, health care, mortality, and death.
Men/Women (Communication Skills for Couples)
Because men tend to be more task-oriented in their communication styles and women tend to be more process-oriented, men tend to want to solve issues immediately, while women tend to want to talk about them more and come to a consensus about what should be done.
Children (Communication Skills for Couples)
How children develop physically, socially, emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually are often topics of discussion. Focusing on the best ways to consistently meet children’s needs is considered being child-centred.
Family/In-Laws/Friends (Communication Skills for Couples)
Couples often talk about situations and circumstances surrounding the interactions they have with their closest relationships.
Commitment (Communication Skills for Couples)
How we “hang in there” and contribute to our marital friendship, even when things aren’t going particularly well, is a sign of how committed we are to our relationship. Loyalty and fidelity are aspects of commitment and trust.
Trust (Communication Skills for Couples)
Trusting relationships are relationships in which both partners are dependable, available to support each other, and responsive to each other’s needs. An ability to negotiate conflict and a positive outlook about the future of the relationship are also components of trust.
Intimacy (Communication Skills for Couples)
The social, intellectual, emotional, spiritual, and physical connections we make with each other determine the levels of intimacy we experience in our relationships.
Everyone can bring their own history into a relationship and it can be common to repeat the same mistakes again hoping for a better outcome, only to become surprised when things do not go well.
Knowing what each party brings into a relationship and being able to own and acknowledge this, can often provide a basis from which a couple can grow and improve together.
How Can We Communicate Better?
Open, honest communication should be a part of every healthy relationship. Use the tips given below to open up the channels of communication between you and your partner. If you’re in an unhealthy or abusive relationship, be careful when using these tips. You know your relationship best. It is very important therefore to note that if any of these tips would put you in danger, don’t try them.
For healthier communication, try to:
Find the Right Time. If something is bothering you and you would like to have a conversation about it, it can be helpful to find the right time to talk. Try to find a time when both you and your partner are calm and not distracted, stressed or in a rush. You might even consider scheduling a time to talk if one or both of you is really busy!
Talk Face to Face. Avoid talking about serious matters or issues in writing. Text messages, letters and emails can be misinterpreted. Talk in person so there aren’t any unnecessary miscommunications. If you’re having trouble collecting your thoughts, consider writing them down ahead of time and reading them out loud to your partner.
Do Not Attack. Even when we mean well, we can sometimes come across as harsh because of our word choice. Using “you” can sound like you’re attacking, which will make your partner defensive and less receptive to your message. Instead, try using “I” or “we.” For example, say “I feel like we haven’t been as close lately” instead of “You have been distant with me.”
Be Honest. Agree to be honest. Sometimes the truth hurts, but it’s the key to a healthy relationship. Admit that you aren’t always perfect and apologize when you make a mistake instead of making excuses. You will feel better and it will help strengthen your relationship.
Check Your Body Language. Let your partner know you’re really listening by giving them your full attention: sit up, face them and make eye contact when speaking. Don’t take a phone call, text or play a video game when you’re talking. Show your partner you respect them by listening and responding.
Use the 48 Hour Rule. If your partner does something that makes you angry, you need to tell them about it. But you don’t have to do so right away. If you’re still hurt 48 hours later, say something. If not, consider forgetting about it. But remember your partner can’t read your mind. If you don’t speak up when you’re upset, there is no way for them to apologize or change. Once you do mention your hurt feelings and your partner sincerely apologies, let it go. Don’t bring up past issues if they’re not relevant.
Communicating isn’t always easy. At first, some of these tips may feel unnatural or awkward, but they will help you communicate better and build a healthy relationship.
Here’s Something we discovered that will help communication in a marital relationship. Its called 1000 Questions for Couples by Michael Webb. 1000 questions for couples is an ebook written by Michael Webb, the 1000 Questions for Couple pdf is a tool for improving relationship as well as saving marriages from divorces. The author of this book – Michael Webb – is an expert in counseling couples and also helping them realize what is important to having a successful marriage life.
As the title implies, the 1000 Questions for Couple pdf ebook is a guide that presents 1000 most frequently asked questions couples have about their relationships. The author expertly answered all these questions assisting dating and married get a better perspective on the various issues they are confronting in their relationship.
As many of the 1000 Questions of Couples will say, the 1000 Questions for Couples ebook is not intended for married couples alone. Young couples can also make use of this advantage. If you wish to take your relationship to the next level, then I strongly recommend this program for you.
Michael Webb put in his expertise, experience and study of relationship to compile series of questions that he feel will be essential for every couples, married or not, to improve their relationship. 1000 question’s for couple’s is compilation of all these questions into one awesome book. If you feel that your relationship wth your partner needs a fresh start then I suggest you kick start your relationship with 1000 questions for couple’s pdf eBook.
Also, if you just started your relationship and you want to know if you have made a right choice of partner, the 1000 Questions for Couples can help you with the questions you can ask such person to know the kind of person he or she is and if the decision you have just made is the right one. The 1000 Questions for Couples system also contains many fun questions for couples that partners will really enjoy asking and also get better idea about themselves, all this will happen in a natural and funny way and your partner will not notice you were studying him.
Here’s A Little About the Author
If you have been asking yourself who Michael Webb is and why you should trust these 1000 questions he compiled, the section of the 1000 Questions for couples will help to answer ant question you might have about the author.
Michael Webb is a well-known author in relationship, he is also an expert in relationship counseling. Michael has been featured in several television shows including Oprah, websites and magazines. Michael used all his expertise to create the best-selling 1000 Question’s for Couples pdf ebook.
Compared to his previous book that talked more on romance and the things you can do to maintain relationship, this book is really different because it makes you ask yourself a very important question which is “how much do you know your partner?”. The 1000 Questions for Couples program by Michael Webb covers 1000 questions related to love, romance and commitments which you can ask your partners as your relationship grows.
According to Michael Webb, he was inspired by the research of Dr. Arthur Aron, who is also an expert in relationships. According to the author, the questions put together in the 1000 Questions for Couples system are questions that not only can make partners fall in love with each other the more but should always ask each other.